Being There Isn’t Enough
Last night was another crash and burn on our path to sexual adventure.
Due to the cold weather we went to bed at 9:00 p.m. Though we’d just seen an hour of television my mind was still chattering and I needed time to myself in order to relax. So, I suggested we read. As fate would have it, Lyn was
thinking togetherness time and suggested reading a book jointly.
At first I turned down the idea. Then after thinking about it I agreed to it. Of course Lyn now felt jilted and refused to let me change my decision. So off we went to our separate books with the agreement to get back together in an hour.
As I read, Lyn mostly slept. Knowing if I didn’t wake her there would be no togetherness time, I gave her a nudge each time she started snoring. Each awakening brought another snarl. When I woke her the final time to let her know it was time I had a sleepy bear on my hands.
When we started this sexual journey, Lyn said she wanted to choose the sexual adventures for awhile because it would help her growth. So, I asked her what she had planned. “Nothing.” was the answer. Now it was my time to feel hurt. What that said to me is, “Our time tonight isn’t worth two minutes of planning.”
As if that didn’t give the thought of sex a critical blow, it was completely terminated when Lyn said, “I’m committed!”
It was then I realised time commitment is all well and good (especially when you consider I didn’t even have that three weeks ago), but it’s not enough for me. Good sex in my opinion needs to have some direction. I don’t want it to be so planned out it’s mechanical, but I don’t just want a guaranteed body either.

